Very cool podcast I was part of that offers a very unique perspective on how many of us with disabilities approach the conversations with our caregivers when we want to be intimate with a new person in our life, and how we handle those conversations.
Probably not something you think much about, but it’s an important topic that constantly gets pushed aside and is left unrecognized!
I personally have had a lot of really interesting experiences and conversations when I was engaged in the dating part of my life prior to getting married. Some wild conversations for sure 😉
The absurdity of spinal cord injury with respect to the fact that being paralyzed is oftentimes the least of your challenges as compared to the endless secondary medical complications, caregiving challenges, financial burdens, to name a few, can turn a perfectly sane individual into one who is tinkering on the edge of insanity. The question remains is how do so many of us with these life altering changes cope with, what can only be described at times, as a revolving circus carnival of animals?
We each develop and build upon our own coping mechanisms as the year’s progress and as we become a little bit older and wiser in spinal cord injury years. For me, dark humor is, bar none, my number one savior to get me through most days.
Becoming a quadriplegic and being paralyzed from the chest down may appear to be the most challenging life altering event many may ever go through in their life. However, leaving aside the endless secondary complications that can arise from living a life with paralysis such as pressure sores, nerve pain, respiratory issues, osteoporosis, infections, bowel obstructions, bladder incontinence, to name a few, can, often times, pale in comparison to the financial burdens associated with living a life with paralysis. The financial hardships associated with any type of disability, one could argue, is more debilitating than the disability itself!
For the purposes of this article I’m going to be discussing some of the financial challenges and realities of living a life as a quadriplegic as opposed to a paraplegic. In general, a quadriplegic needs round-the-clock care to help with basic functions such as going to the bathroom, eating, dressing, etc. While every injury is different and there are certainly some quadriplegics who I know who live independently, I will tell you about my life in particular.
I’m super excited & honored to have been featured in a news story by Spectrum News on disability inclusion in light of recent events with the paralympian who was unable to bring her caregiver, her mother, to Tokyo.
As I always say, Disability Doesn’t Discriminate — anyone can join the club for any reason and creating a globally inclusive environment whether that be in the paralympics, employment world, your community, the government, etc. should be at the forefront of everyone’s mind!
Technological, societal, and environmental shifts are reshaping how many companies engage with people, customers, and communities. This is paving the way for systemic change in how we include underrepresented communities in the employment world.
Over the last several months I’ve been pondering and am now actively pursuing a new professional career in the world of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI). This is not a new emerging field within organizations, but over the last several years it is fast becoming an ever more critical area for organizations, corporations, and stakeholders around the world to focus on. More specifically, in light of today’s societal changes we need to strive to incorporate a more diverse and equitable culture for women, people of color, members of the LGBTQ community, and the disability community.
By recognizing the unique challenges faced by leaders with disabilities, organizations can build more comprehensive diversity policies to create an inclusive environment for all employees. Historically, executive level leaders have felt the need to be seen as superhuman in order to survive, a culture that has resulted in displaying one of invincibility and infallibility. This needs to change because once higher level corporate executives realize a disability is not a disadvantage in the corporate culture, the entire corporate structure, from the top down, will make way for real systemic change.
There’s an art and a science to pretty much everything in life and surviving for weeks on end in the ICU is no different. With a majority of medical professionals being woefully under trained in all of the secondary complications accompanying spinal cord injury, the thought of trying to stay alive while you’re in the hospital can be a daunting prospect -especially when you have to play your own investigator in assisting these professionals with your diagnoses.
However, while there’s definitely a certain amount of research, planning, and preparation that needs to be thought out by the patient when you are essentially locked into the hospital by your medical professionals; you can have a little fun with it as well. Living on the edge of life and death, as many folks with spinal cord injury will very likely attest to, I find taking a dark humor outlook on most situations to be healing for my body, and my soul.
Despite my long ICU stay in 2016, I maintained a cheery disposition, but this time I decided to do something a little bit wackier to pass the time. What pray tell did I do you may ask?
It’s hard to believe that it’s only the middle of February and with the state of affairs in the world today I try very hard to focus my energy on affecting change in whatever capacity I am able to in order to bring a little bit of light into this world. I’ve said this time and time again, but kindness, positivity, and perseverance go a long way in my book.
I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t attempt to put actions to my words. So, I have made quick work of focusing on two new Blue Cross and Blue Shield cases, which I believe are so important for so many who are disabled.
My overarching mission in these constant insurance battles is not to just simply win “stuff” from insurance companies, but rather to strategically attain medically necessary durable medical equipment that not only improves the quality of so many people’s lives, including my own, but our independence and dignity.
The challenge lies in that many of our health insurance policies are simply outdated and many of them do not factor in the special needs for those who are severely disabled. With that said, it is my goal to create a host of documents with letters of medical necessity written, so patients can just hand them to their doctors and fill in the necessary personal information.
I’m working to change the system from the inside out, but in the meantime many of us really need to learn how to operate and navigate within the broken system we are currently faced with. It’s not easy and most people don’t have the time, energy, or know-how to get things accomplished. Unfortunately, many people just take their insurance policy at its word and don’t test the system.
Change does not come from blind compliance!
We have to push the boundaries because we are, the disabled community, a very much forgotten about segment of the population in the eyes of health insurance policies.